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Episode #66
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Now, whenever you put something new out into the world it is a bit nerve-wracking! I remember when I first left my corporate job and changed my ‘under the radar’ side hustle into a full-time business, I was so worried about what people would think, specifically my friends and my former colleagues. Would they think I’m crazy, would they wonder why I was doing it? would they think what I was doing was good enough?
Until a friend broke it to me that really, they are not going to care! They’re all getting on with their own lives and are too caught up in that to really care what you are up to. And that is so true! But saying that, there are people who will have an opinion whether that is good or bad and you have to be prepared for naysayers and guard yourself against them.
A FROG STORY
I still get a bit nervous now when I launch something new, well maybe not nervous but I definitely wonder how it will be received and what comments I’ll get. But whenever I start to worry about what doubts people have about what I’m doing, or what they will say, I remind myself of the story of the two frogs which is an ancient, oriental fable, written by Hsien-Sheng Liang. You can listen to the podcast episode to hear the full story.
Basically, two frogs are stuck in a hole jumping to get out while all their froggy friends are shouting at them that they will never do it, it’s impossible and they should just resign themselves to being at the bottom. One listens to the shouts and gives up, but the other keeps trying and eventually makes it out. It turns out he is deaf and could not hear the negative shouts and so kept going. He actually thought they were cheering him on.
STORY TAKEAWAYS
For me, there are a few messages to take from this story.
It teaches us the importance of being resilient, strong and persevering at all times, even when times are challenging. Always try different options and different paths. Don’t assume that just because one path does not work, another will not be successful. And that sometimes, something else has to happen for us to be able to see the way ahead. So try to keep going, keep persevering, and keep focused on taking the next step, until the right path appears.
Of course, a key message in the fable is that words have power and we should be careful what we say to others but mainly what we allow ourselves to hear. As the frog couldn’t hear, they kept going oblivious to the negativity that had convinced their friend to give up. Unfortunately, we can’t always block out negative comments that can come from people all around us.
People are always willing to give their advice, even if they don’t know anything about what you want to do. Or have limiting beliefs about what is possible in life. Which usually comes from their own insecurities, not of their belief in you. So, you have to be careful not to let other people’s lack of belief affect you.
BLOCKING OUT THE NAYSAYERS
To do that, to be strong on the path you choose, to block out any negative feedback or voices, you first need to believe in yourself. In the story, our deaf frog really believed they could do it once they DECIDED they were getting out of that hole. And that belief which they had in THEMSELF, made the criticism and disbelief of the frogs above appear as, instead, the support to keep on going. They believed so completely in their ability to leap out of the hole in some way, that they assumed that the other frogs must be cheering for them because they were certain that they believed in him. That’s the power of having a strong belief in yourself and your plans, it turns everything into a stepping stone or opportunity to keep moving forward. You start to zone out of the negative and focus on the positive and all that can support you to make your dream happen.
And what happens when you do succeed in your plans? All those people that had been negative or concerned, or had warned you against going with your plans. They will all cheer for you once you make it. When you succeed. Ironically, probably saying that they knew all along you could do it!
THE BOTTOM LINE IS…
It doesn’t matter what other people think or say, it’s what you believe. If you believe you are meant to be doing something else with your life, and you believe that you have the passion, talent and skills to make it happen. That what you have chosen is the right new path for you. If you do hear negative comments from someone about your exciting choices or decisions (that are not coming from love but from a place of fear or jealousy), thank them for their opinion and move on.
Don’t let their words have any power over you. Surround yourself with people that do believe and will cheer you. But know that even if they aren’t there (or if you can't hear their cheering), you still have the belief, resilience and strength inside to achieve success.
